You might have recently seen an interview with Chunkz, where he says the only reason he would disown a child, is if they left Islam. If you haven’t seen it, you can watch it here. This one bought up many emotions for me, mainly anger and disappointment.
Not everyone knows that families sometimes disown children if they leave high-control religions. Whilst this is not exclusive to Islam and does happen in other religions, it is mainly people who come from Muslim families that come to me for support. I believe this is because of my own experiences with leaving Islam.
Why does this happen so much, even here in the UK? There is often the question of Izzat (shame) and fear of the afterlife. Parents believe that their child leaving the religion will also condemn them to Hell. This means they have a lot of pressure on them to ensure their child follows the religion.
So, that’s one of the reasons why we find parents who share Chunkz’ views of disowning a child who leaves Islam. They don’t want to spend an eternity in Hell, so they have to do all they can do make sure their children are behaving in a way that will stop this from happening. Of course, chatter from the wider community is also a concern. I mean, what if auntie down the road knows that they raised a child who is a ‘sinner’. They would never be able to overcome the shame.
So, who suffers the consequences of these parents, who are unable to leave the grasps of the religion that has controlled them their whole life? Well, of course, their children! It gets passed down, through generations. Chunkz’ future children – your generational trauma awaits.
I really thought those raised in the UK, might start to break this generational curse of controlling religions. Can’t we have some flexibility, let our children think for themselves?
If you are leaving Islam, or are facing disownment, and want support with this, you can contact me here.
Signing off, wishing we could do better for the next generation x